Seek Counseling

I think she has a lot of great qualities, but you should not just put up with a controlling person and do nothing. You need to sit down with her and tell her that you have some major hang-ups about getting married. Show her this list! Tell her, "i cannot marry you until we work these issues out. I don't like being told what to do. I don't want to be scared to make my own choices, for fear of making you mad and being called names. Until that changes, we need to seperate" I really think counseling would improve so many of her issues. She is probably covering some kind of insecurity, and being controlling is making her feel more secure and in control of her life. This can be worked out thru therapy. You don't have to break up for good, just work on the important things. Tell her you want to have an equal relationship, and you want to connect on a deeper level, you want to know her heart and soul before you marry her.
Trust me, I wish i had done this before i got married. I didn't and now i'm divorced and alone. Wasted 7 years of my life....