Bachelor Infinitum

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My boyfriend lives with me and had proposed marriage (in an off-handed manner) when we thought we were going to relocate together for a new job he had accepted.  However, after much consideration on his part, he decided to decline the job offer for reasons outside of the relationship and stay where we are now.

It has been almost 5 months since that event occured and he hasn't brought up the marriage topic with me since.  I've tried bringing it up several times when I feel that there is no hope that he will act on his proposal (meaning giving me anything symbolic--either a more genuinue proposal or a ring of any value), so I end up getting mad at him and frustrated.

I realize I am not perfect and have a short fuse sometimes.  His response to me is that he does not want to propose to me under pressure, which I agree with, but I still can't help feel that time is slipping by with no action on his part.

Perhaps I'm being impatient, but he has a history of prolonging and procrastinating on small and big things that he said he would do.  These past few months have been very upsetting for me because I feel a bit hopeless that he will continue to procrastinate on this and with each day I feel myself resenting him more and more.  I love him and I want to share a life with him, but I feel he needs to make some changes or I cannot spend my life in this limbo state with him.  I feel we're old enough (I'm 34 and he's 41) that  "dating" should not be our future together and it's time we decide to be together or go our separate ways.

I know the pro-con list below is heavy on the con, but things have been building up over time.  Any advice, including how I can change my own mental state or behaviour?

Pro: 
  • Trustworthy and loyal to me and his friends.
  • He does not make me doubt his love for me, no games or lies.  I know that his love is real and true.
  • Can be thoughtful and takes care of me
  • Smart and not intimidated (or turned-off) by my braininess
  • Good person with good morals
  • Unique, not the typical frat-boy type
  • Knows himself and confident
  • Athletic and outdoorsy.  We enjoy outdoor activities together.
  • Super foodie and great cook.  We enjoy the finer things in life together like great food and wine.
  • Employeed in a stable job
  • Very handsome
  • Similar political views and outlook on life
  • Enjoy traveling together
Con: 
  • Living together has been taxing in some ways and comfortable in others
  • Less motivated to do things/activities/not spontaneous
  • Pretty set in his ways and stubborn
  • Scared of change/usually prefers the status quo
  • May be commitment phobe because I am his longest relationship
  • Complacent and a super procrastinator which is opposite of me where I can be too impatient and want things done today.  We often clash on this because I become the nag and he resists even more.  His procrastination makes him not keep his word when it comes to small things (errands, etc..) or big things (selling/renting out his house, manage his budget, etc...) that he agreed to or promised me at one point.  It makes feel like I can't count on him for even small things, let alone the big things in life. 
  • Low sexual stamina/not physically passionate
  • Anti-social when it comes to my friends
  • Lacks ambition though has a very good, solid, intellectually-challenging career.
  • Poor communicator, especially when it comes to expressing feelings
  • Comes from divorced parents, so strained family relationships
  • Overly sensitive/easily irritated/self-absorbed sometimes
  • Pretty negative about people (not about me) and is often depressed
  • Does not have a plan for life and not very open to talking about one
  • Poor money management

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