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Stay or Go - Outside Help Needed
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My boyfriend and I have been dating for 15months and we've been relatively happy up until recently. He has a drinking problem which turns him into a type of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde personality. He can be happy as Larry one moment and something so small can trigger a complete flip in personality and it's like I'm the worst person in the world. He knows his actions are due to the drink and has cut back dramatically but now I'm not sure if we're fighting all the time because of him or because I'm getting oversensitive to the situations. I'm almost scared to be out with him for fear of a fight occurring. I really do love him and I know that he loves me (perhaps not as much as me?) and I don't want this relationship to end. He just has a funny way of showing it sometimes =S
Pro:
Supportive of me and my choices/decisions
Loving
Caring when he's not in a drunken rage
Thoughtful when he wants to be
Very Romantic and Spontaneous when he wants to be
Sexually satisfying
I still love every touch he gives me and he still sends shivers up my spine when he says or does things
I still find him VERY attractive
I miss him even when we're apart for a day!
We can laugh together and have fun
Patient
We have the same goals - we want to buy a house together, get married and have children eventually - he says (when I question those things) that he wouldn't be wasting his time in a relationship if he didn't want those things with me
I have sexual health problems and he is always very understanding of that and waits for weeks on end - even though we are naturally both very sexually oriented people
This is the best relationship I have been in, ever.
My family love him
I can't imagine my life without him
I can see a future with him and no-one else
Con:
We fight a lot but only about a select few things when we're both sober and coherent
I cop abuse (never physical) when he is drunk and something sets him off
I feel like I'm walking through a mine-field when he is drunk
I feel that his drinking is a problem but he thinks he has done all needs to, to fix it (which I greatly appreciate as it is - he has cut back the alcohol DRAMATICALLY for the sake of me and our relationship)
I feel I love him a great deal more than he loves me
He used to make me feel special, safe and comforted when I needed it - this has gone
Not the best at communicating his feelings when we're trying to sort things out
Not keen on my ideas ie: my choice in movies, choice in music, ideas of things to do, places to go etc
I feel like he doesn't like my family despite thefact that he's told me he does
I have trust issues even though he has NEVER done anything to deceive me
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